I own a chainsaw. And I admit, here and now, that there's a certain sense of power from grabbing a hold of it and pulling that power cord. And it's not even a very big chainsaw. I can only imagine what it must be like to handle one of the monsters professional loggers use.
The thing is, though, I think there's a problem here. Take, for example, the poster for Rec 3 (below).
Look what we have here, folks! Not just a woman, but a bride, blood-stained, and... CARRYING A CHAINSAW! Well, why not?
I'll tell you why not. A chainsaw is scary. It's brutal. And it's pretty useful when it comes to either felling trees, causing horrific accidents, or slicing someone up who's probably tied down. However, as a weapon? As something you'd choose to grab and run around with, chopping and hacking and ripping and tearing your way to freedom? Er... no.
A chainsaw is heavy and unwieldy. You go swinging one around and you're as likely to slice you're own head off as mash into the chest of your attacker. You might get a lucky hit, sure, but that's the thing here: luck is too much a part of using a chainsaw as a weapon.
There are other problems, too. Chainsaws run out of fuel. And if you happen to stumble upon one, how can you be sure it's got enough to get you through? The blades clog up and stick, which would be rather irritating mid-fight. And, despite the safety features now common to all makes of chainsaw, they're still lethal. Why else do you think the professionals wear helmets, face protection and kevlar? Running around with a chainsaw while wearing a wedding dress might not be your best plan.
A chainsaw looks good on camera. It's a horror icon. It's in too many films to mention (Evil Dead 2, Last House on the Left, and Scarface for example). And I'd like to suggest that we've probably seen enough now. You want to kill zombies? Grab yourself a baseball bat, a spade, something that you can just swing and swing and swing. But leave that chainsaw where it is because you're probably better off without it.