I think I'm supposed to feel more elated than I do. Trust me, I'm amazed, stunned, excited, happy, giddy... but in my idiotic brain, I'd built this moment up so much, that nothing short of a total eclipse, lots of fireworks, and some dancing monkeys would match it.
This has a lot to do with that build-up we're all prone to giving events in our lives, but when they transpire, they're brilliant, but not neccessarily knock-you-dead. We expect one specific sliver of time to crack us one on the chin and change our lives. But that doesn't really do justice to all the work that's gone before, without which this 'moment' wouldn't even exist.
I'm seeing it now more as a crescendo of events and experiences that are taking me further and further in to a world I simply can't believe I'm a part of. From getting the chance to try out for a ghost-writing job, tolanding a major celebrity ghost-writing deal, through landing a frighteningly good agent, and then to signing the contract for The Dead, writing it, seeing it turn up in print, getting a website together, doing interviews...
Events are cool, milestones that give us a little something to wave at and take photographs of as we pass them. But it's the journey that's so important, surely. And I'm still only at the beginning of mine. Which, to be frank, is possibly the most exciting thing of all...
Dave
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